In a very real sense, we can train our brains. Recently, I somehow trained mine to crave cereal late at night. Ironically, Crave is one of my favorites. Golden Grahams aren’t bad either. Before long, every evening I felt a strong urge to knock down a few bowls.
I also trained my brain to want to watch a show whenever I was tired or bored. So when that feeling hit, I’d automatically turn on the TV. These habits weren’t intentional they just slowly became my default. But now it’s time to retrain my brain toward better outlets.
Scripture says, “Whoever loves pleasure will become poor.” When the pleasures I turn to are cereal and streaming shows, they don’t promote growth in any meaningful area of life. So I’ve committed to replacing those automatic habits with ones that actually enrich me.
The good news is, I have plenty of better options outside of Golden Grahams and Better Call Saul. Last night, Marilyn and I simply hung out. I can read a book I enjoy. I can go for a walk. I can listen to an audiobook while working on a home project. I can call a close friend or family member. And yes—another meaningful and God-designed outlet is coming together sexually with your spouse.
Simply put: Choose the pleasures that build you, not the ones that numb you.
I want to channel my desires toward things that promote growth, connection, and joy not just things that taste good or help me escape for 45 minutes. Don’t get me wrong there’s nothing wrong with watching a TV show. The problem is when our brains are trained to turn to it every time we’re bored or tired.
Even in just a few days, this mindset shift has already helped my marriage. I’ve found myself more helpful, more present, and more intentional with Marilyn.
Action Item
Ask yourself:
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What outlet do I regularly turn to—TV, social media, alcohol, food—when I’m bored or tired?
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What healthier, more life-giving outlets could I turn to instead?
Brad Rhoads is co-founder of Grace Marriage.
Brad Rhoads is co-founder of Grace Marriage.