Recently, I was with my 22-year-old daughter and driving her car when I noticed she was almost out of gas. I pulled over, filled up the tank, and paid for it. She didn’t make a big deal about it, and we drove off.
At first, I thought, I just paid $50 and she didn’t even say thank you. Then it hit me—she was so used to me taking care of her when she was with me that she simply expected that kind of love.
Marriage can work the same way.
When you consistently love your spouse well, you may not always get thanked for the things you do. If you make coffee every morning, wash the clothes each week, go to work every day, pay the bills, manage the finances, or help the kids with homework every night, your love can become so steady and dependable that it almost feels invisible.
That doesn’t mean it isn’t valuable.
In fact, if you suddenly make the bed and your spouse goes over the top thanking you, it might be a sign you don’t do it very often.
Our goal in marriage is not to collect praise for every act of service. Our goal is to love our spouse well, honor God, and lay our lives down for one another.
So if you’re not getting thanked, don’t ease up. Be encouraged. It may simply mean you’ve created a home where love is constant and dependable.
But there is another side to this truth: be thankful.
If your spouse has been faithfully serving your family, don’t let consistency become the enemy of gratitude. Notice what they do. Speak appreciation often. Scripture reminds us to “Honor one another above yourselves” (Romans 12:10) and “If honor, then honor” (Romans 13:7).
Never assume their effort should go unnoticed.
Action Items:
- If you aren’t getting thanked, be encouraged.
- If you aren’t giving thanks, start today.
- Notice one consistent thing your spouse does and express gratitude for it.
- Give honor where honor is due.